Sales tips, leadership communication skills insight and more from Steve Giglio, sales training professional for more than 25 years.

You Don’t Get a Free Pass

football-5-1186483-639x416In our instant access, instant disclosure world, it’s important to bear in mind that as a leader you don’t get a free pass on inappropriate behavior.

What you get is a write up in the National Inquirer that you lost your cool. Of course, I don’t mean this literally, I mean it figuratively. But the point is that you will have shone a light on your bad behavior and lots of people will notice.

Remember Tom Hanks’s famous line in the movie “A League Of Their Own”… “There’s no crying in baseball!” Well, there’s no aberrant behavior that come from emotions in business. Being emotional, and making rash decisions based on those emotions, gives you a scarlet letter you don’t need. It says to people you’re not as stable as they thought you were.

Practice Patience

An example of what I mean is making a personnel decision after being provoked to do so. Rumor disguised as information may come your way and you quickly react, thinking that that is what a good leader does. No, it isn’t.

To neutralize this behavior, it’s important to have forebearance, meaning having patient restraint when provoked. I often coach leaders to catch their emotional moments and substitute the emotion with foerbearance and an illustration of a higher level of groundedness than the issue merits.

Keep Your Cool to Win

Think of an NFL Quarterback. Those who lose their cool, who overreact to what’s happening instead of anticipating it, those who get flustered when things don’t go their way…well, you won’t see them in the Hall of Fame any time soon (or ever!). But those who maintain a steady composure, work the problem at hand instead of fretting about it and keep their emotions in check, you’re likely to see one or more championship rings on their fingers before their career winds down.

Act calmly and appropriately. Because remember…the Inquirer is always watching!

New Leaders…Stay Insecure For a While

The opportunity has arrived! You’ve been anointed as the heir apparent. Congratulations…you are now the boss. You can start telling everyone what to do.
NO! Keep your humility, drop the swagger… I said drop it! Keep a clear head as you proceed.

Lead First…Delegate Later

Sorry to be so immovable on this point BUT, in my experience coaching new leaders, far too many executives move from being in the weeds to only touching them. Too often the first skill they hone is delegation when they should be leading by example. People know when you haven’t done the required homework for important corporate events/moves.  You can’t fool them!

Collaboration Builds Their Confidence in You

The reason I recommend remaining insecure a bit longer is that it forces you to collaborate with everyone and gather feedback in whatever form or tone it takes. This illustrates your humility and forbearance with people. It says their voice is important to you. It affirms people. And in turn, they gain confidence in your abilities.

Avoid Forcing Change

As you start your new leadership position, act as though everyone around you will remain as they are both in character and in their ability to guide your leadership actions. By operating this way, you can adapt your style to fit how they work best and persuade people from the character they have presented, not the one you want them to have. Eventually, you can affect the change you want but first, you have to see things from their perspective. They’ll make note of that effort and are more likely to accept your future plans.

Are you new to your leadership role? Let me know what your biggest challenge is below in the comments. Thanks!

Leaders…Think Before You Email

Communication of any type is always open to interpretation. Even face to face conversations are influenced by body language and other factors. Email is perhaps the most prone to misinterpretation as there is no auditory tone nor physical delivery. It’s just text.

So before you fire off an email, especially one that contains potentially tough information, here are four key To-Do’s BEFORE sending to insure that your intent is understood and accepted the way you want it to be:

#1: Know the Climate

You’ve got to know the climate into which you are sending your email. Is it friendly, hostile, or indifferent? And you’ve got to take responsibility for this environment. Ask yourself, if I’m him/her how would I react to this message? What would I intimate from it? Is there a deeper message here? You need to know where your reader is relative to your message. Will they still understand the “you” you want them to understand?

#2: Link Your Purpose to Your Reader’s Purpose

Often what you want and what your reader wants are two different things. By starting out with their purpose, you show your empathy. For example, if you want someone to stop procrastinating with an issue, initiate your message from the value moving it forward will have to them. What this does is it credentials you as an empathetic individual, reminding them that you are there to help achieve THEIR goals.

#3: See Their Reaction Before Their Reaction

You can do this. First, visualize how they’ll read your email, what they’ll think, and how they will react. Then, write it based on this visualization. Once you’re clear on how they will react, make sure they can self-realize your positive intent. If you see too many ways in which the message could be interpreted as counter to your intention, start over!

#4: Tailor Your Next Response

Yes, just like a chess match, know your next three responses from this communication. The more you understand your reader’s world, the easier it is to determine how they will respond. Remember, you are not communicating to yourself; you are communicating to another person with a different agenda than yours. Are you ready for resistance?  What do you believe it will be and what will be your reaction? Conversely, are you ready for acceptance and have your next steps lined up? This level of anticipation will increase your agility, building your reputation as a valued partner.

Try out these tips before your next difficult communique and let me know how it goes. At the very least, you will feel better as you send it, eliminating some of the anxiety that might have accompanied it otherwise!

Don’t Orphan Your Board Members

They don’t get it.

Why do they still ask the same questions?

I really have these issues handled.

Many a President/CEO I’ve heard utter these laments. And each time I hear them, I begin x-raying the situation. Most often I find that a set of Board members have been unwittingly orphaned by the exec. By orphaned I mean excluded from a leader’s strategic plan or vision.

Build a Board Relationship…Individually

Job #1 is to develop a relationship with EACH Board member. Every Board member is different, no matter what they purport.
Remember, every person in business wants to be affirmed, board members are no different. They enjoy speaking their mind and explaining their values and what’s important to them.

Let them.

Acceptance First…Convincing Second

The more you understand their values the easier it is to persuade them to embrace your ideas and recommendations.
I believe that people buy people first and solutions/product/services second. That means that you need to be accepted as a confident and respected ally BEFORE you present your ideas for your organization.

Enjoy the breakfast meetings with each Board member, you’ll learn a lot about who they are and what’s mission critical to them.

You just have to ask…and listen.

Restructuring Saves Lives

“I think the world of Jane but she seems to be in over her head. But, I’ve got to advance her division.”

These decisions are tough for many leaders. On one hand, you know, trust and enjoy working with Jane. On the other hand, over the past six months, her area has significantly declined in ROI. It’s time to sit down with Jane and find out her level of understanding regarding her, and her team’s, lack of performance along with determining what is important to her now.

Understanding the Pressure

People change. Business changes. Pressures remain.

It is essential to create an environment of empathy and curiosity regarding Jane’s situation. Have her detail her view. You should commit to listening without bias, without a predetermined agenda. Notice how she speaks about the issues, her degree of responsibility to them and her desire to cure them. Each of these three areas can be quite telling. She may reveal an awareness of the problems and a well thought-out plan to resolve them. However, she may be confused and frustrated, not understanding what’s going on or resigned to the problem with an air of defensiveness. At least now you know what you’re working with here!

Caring by Restructuring

One solution can be restructuring Jane’s area along with restructuring her. Determine an area where you believe Jane can make a difference and that will get her confidence back. This demonstration of YOUR loyalty to her could save her for a time. Look for others who can take on some of her responsibilities and/or assist her as she gets the department back on its feet. You get to hit the “reset” button with someone you believe in, and she gets a new lease on life. She’ll also see who on the team is there to help her and who is not. Throughout this time, though, create a formalized coaching plan for her. Meet with her regularly with specific metrics of success that you both create together.

Have a situation like this on your team? Tell me about it in the comments below. Thanks!

 

I’m Ready! No, You’re Not.

Your View: I am ready for a seat at the executive table.

Your Boss’ View: Nope…not yet.

Your Reaction: What’s wrong with me?

There’s Nothing Wrong

I certainly understand the feeling that there must be something wrong or you’d be getting the call to go up the majors. That call will come. You just need to be patient and in the meantime, work on your skills so you are ready.

When your manager recommends a development program based on your 360 evaluation, it means he believes in you and wants you to succeed. He wants you at the table…and is ready to give you the tools you need to get there. You’re in a process of transformation. What that means is you have been given a profound opportunity to transform certain behaviors that have precluded you from the executive table and/or voice you want to have heard.

You Have Work to Do

It’s akin to the AAA league in baseball, known as “the minors.” Players at that level are given the opportunity to work on their skills, develop good habits, work with other exceptional players/coaches and learn. If they apply themselves daily to the goal of getting to the major league, they will be ready when the call comes and take advantage of it. A guy name Derek Jeter started that way. Ever heard of him?

Get Ready and Be Patient

Like with Jeter, your development process and transformation won’t happen overnight. Typically, it happens over a year or more. Be patient. Jeter spent three years in the minors! Being anxious or worse, feeling entitled to a seat the executive table, will only set you back. Being genuine and relationally tenacious with your executive recommendations will win the day and solidify your transformed image.

Stay with it. People need time to change their mind; you need time to change their thinking.

The Courage To Learn From Others

Receiving feedback that stings is always difficult. None of us wants a scarlet letter on us regarding our behavior.

In my previous blog post, I spoke about the value of feedback and the gift it actually is, providing you hold it as such. One of the best ways to begin to neutralize feedback like this is to meet with the stakeholders who provided it. I know you’re saying, you can’t be serious?

I am. It takes some courage. And they’re unlikely to give you a medal for it. But, you’ll reap rewards in the long run.

Be Willing to Listen

Just the overture alone of meeting with certain execs and asking them how you can augment your behavior sends a profound message of humility and desire to change. Just think to yourself, “I wonder if they could do this when their time comes?” At the very least, you are a setting a good example to your directs…which is what leaders should do, right?

Be Willing to Change

There are two main reasons why you should embrace the feedback and get more of it directly from the sources:

One, you’ll learn what is really important to them and how you “show up” to them now. This will be the baseline upon which you begin altering your behavior to align with their expectations.

Two, you’ll get a window into certain actions you can take that may, at first seem risky, but are really no more than acknowledging a current behavior you’ve manifested and substituting this behavior with another.

Just trying it sends a great message of sincere desire to get in lock-step with the execs.

Try it the next time you get some not-so-great feedback and let me know how it goes.

It’s Not Me…The Problem Is The Job

Of course it’s not you. The job…that’s the real issue, right? If only your skills were being put to use in a more productive way.

Oh really?

As you develop as an executive, and coach others as well, you will discover that leadership is more about the courage and desire to change than it is about finding blame.

You Have to Want It

To develop yourself, you have to want it. Doesn’t work any other way! Believe me…I’ve seen too many people go through the motions of development but not be fully committed to learning/changing. It’s not worth going through a 360 review or collaborating with a coach unless you TRUST your superior genuinely wants you to grow and advance in your organization.

Trust Them…and You

You also need to TRUST yourself. You need to trust that a part of you knows you need to develop and your boss sees this nascent behavior in you already, they just want to accelerate it for you.

The value of the 360 when done in person, with tailored questions to pinpoint behaviors to strengthen, is a gift of awareness that many executives never get the chance to realize. Hold this feedback as a gift, not a jail sentence.

Are You a Horse?

If enough people call you a horse…buy a saddle. What I mean is, when you get feedback that points to behavior trends, it is the objective evidence you can either a) reject because they just don’t know you well or, b) use to develop yourself. I bet you can guess which option I recommend.

Face it, fifteen people can’t be all wrong, nor can the “job” have done this to you.

Your management team is providing you with your first road map with which to shape into a development plan. Try it, you’ll like it.

Have a Heart: The Responsibility of Consulting/Selling

A while back, I did some consulting with a major retailer in the men’s luxury garment area. My task was to assess their sales teams throughout the US and create a development plan to increase their sales.

One of the first steps I recommended was that I peform a “secret shopper” evaluation to understand their current selling environment. It didn’t take me long to notice something peculiar. The stores were regal and inviting with elegantly presented garments. The sales people were impeccably dressed with great posture. But there was one thing missing…HEART.

I couldn’t find any.

Be Welcoming

When I shared this observation with my client, he lamented that each store was designed to feel as though you were in a person’s living room.

“Funny,” I said,” because when anyone comes into my living room, I ask how their day was, how they’re feeling, what type of beverage they’d enjoy and where they plan on vacationing this year.”

Essentially the hosting role I play is the same role they needed to play and they weren’t.

Be a Good Host

An author client of mine summed it up perfectly; once you’ve invited someone into your home or gain their attention you have a obligation to “host” them for the time they devote to you. They are giving you their time and from this action you have a responsibility to make their time productive. You accomplish this by being a gracious host. Being interested, actually very interested/curious in them is the first key to professional consulting and selling.

When you are with a client pretend they’re in your living room for a Friday evening dinner party…

Let me know how it goes…